Un{happy Hour}

Heyyyyyy, bitch!

Yeah! It’s ME! Happy birthday! ZOMG, Jessica. Your hair looks so … short!

You didn’t think I would come? Um, OF COURSE I came! Anything for my girl!

Mm hm. Mm hm. So sorry! I just need to respond to this real quick. Ugh! Work!

Do you want a drink? Let me buy you a drink. No, I insist! OH-KAY. At least let me get the next one.

Wow. I haven’t been here in ages. This is such a fun choice, especially since it stopped being so cool and popular last year. I’ve always loved that you don’t care what’s in and what’s not. Très ironique!

Mm hm. Mm hm. Hold on … let me just answer this email. You know me! Always working. Classic Meghan, right?

OK. Back. Sorry, girl. B-t-dubs, your dress looks fantastic. Always the Maxxinista! I swear, you can barely tell it’s irregular.

I can’t believe you’re turning the BIG TWO-FOUR.

I know. I’ll be 24 in June. It’s CRAZY. Hashtag adulting!

I feel like I haven’t seen you since I moved in with Dave! Tell me everything.

Mm hm. Totally. Mm hm. Oh, no. I’m still at Thompson. Yeah, same position as when you worked there. No, but with a lot more responsibility. People say I’m really redefining the role.

Anyway! It’s your night. How’s work for you?

Mm hm. Tell me about it. Mm hm. Ugh! I am so sorry. Just let me check this email. This time of year is crazy. Sorry! Last one. Pinky swear. Phone going in purse!

Wait a sec. Did you say BF a minute ago? As in BOYFRIEND? And you just let me miss it? Ho-Ly-Shit, Jessica! Emphasis on the ho!

Um, how’d you meet? Mm hm. Just like me and Dave. No, it’s totally cute.

Très cute. Mm hm. So cute.

Where is he? OMG! He looks like a Trevor, for sure. And he’s, like, way out of your league! YAS, KWEEN!

Well, not to bring the mood down, but Dave and I actually split. Thought you should know. Oh, you did? News travels fast, I guess!

No, I’m doing just fine! Back to dating and focusing on my career. You are SO nice to worry.

You, um, didn’t invite him, did you? I thought I may have seen him CCed on the invite. Just wondering.

No, it’s totally fine! I was a maybe, plus I know you guys interned together last year before we met.

I swear, If you weren’t so sweet, I might have been jealous of you when Dave and I dated!  Plus, you were going through that BS-break up with your college bae.

Chris? Craig? Riiiight. ABDULLAH. Sorry. I knew it was one of those.

Anywho, tell me who else from the old crew is coming? Mm hm. Lucas? Mm hm. I remember him.

So, um, not to be nosy, but is Dave, like, here? He is? Cool. Cool, cool. I forgot this place had a rooftop!

What else … Look, do you need a drink? I need another drink. I’m gonna go get a drink. Rosé OK? I’ll just get a bottle!

It WOULD totally be weird if I didn’t go say hi to Dave, right? I bet the upstairs bar is less crowded, too. Two birds with one stone, right?

Right?

OK. Brb with that rosé. Then we’ll totally catch up. Boys, work, everything.

Love ya, bitch. Mwah.