Dennis William
MeetDennis William
Dennis is an aspiring English teacher and still listens to ska music. He lives in Portland, Oregon, which is fine, just not in the same way that DC is fine.

From the mind of Dennis

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The {(Social)} Distance: A Parody of Cake’s 1996 Hit

A parody of Cake’s “The Distance” reminds us that in this pandemic, it’s actually a good thing that the arena is empty, except for one man.

Dennis William
April 27, 2020
Prompts
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POETRY: Social Distancing Sonnet

These days, how well you prepare is also how well you live. A sonnet for the time of COVID-19, when social distancing is so important.

Dennis William
April 17, 2020
Prompts
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Chronicles of Yak Mouth Falls: Motherly Instincts & {Quicksand}

Things are pretty dangerous out here in Yak Mouth Falls. Between the sasquatch sightings, the wolves, and the quicksand, how will they ever survive?

Dennis William
April 2, 2020
Prompts
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Losing a Stranger We All Know: Why Kobe Bryant’s Death Hits Close to Home

We never really knew Kobe Bryant. So, why does his death feel so intense and familiar to us? What is it about this collective moment that feels so personal?

Dennis William
January 28, 2020
Sports
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What Escape Room?

What does it take to call your business an escape room? One man is determined to find out, probably the hard way. A microfiction masterpiece.

Dennis William
January 9, 2020
Wildcard
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{Hi, My Name Is} Dion—The Time I Tried to Change My Name

Dennis is a fine name, but you know what’s cooler? Dion. I tried to change my name, but you know what they say about the best laid plans…

Dennis William
December 6, 2019
Lifestyle, Prompts
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Quick Arguments: The Pros and Cons of {Last Place}

Josh and Dennis run through the various sports scenarios when it might be beneficial to come in last place. But is it ever acceptable?

Dennis William
November 19, 2019
Prompts
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{How to} Masturbate (for Penis-Havers Who Are Attracted to Ladies)

Looking for advice on how to masturbate? We’ve all been there. WARNING: Squicky, semi-autobiographical honesty ahead.

Dennis William
August 28, 2019
Prompts
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Choosing {Bodies}: Souls Finding Life in The Soup

When a consciousness dies, it must find a new body in order to live. The process of choosing bodies is a real scramble, but that’s just life.

Dennis William
July 31, 2019
Prompts
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