The 10 Most Appropriate Times To Start Drinking While Quarantined

1. As soon as your kids go to bed.

2. As soon as you’re done teleworking.

3. Dinner time.

4. At 4 P.M., regardless of your work schedule.

5. At 4 P.M. EST if you live on the West Coast.

6. It depends on the weather.

7. Any time during the P.M.

8. At the 2:23 mark of Joe Exotic’s “I Saw a Tiger.”

9. If you really think about it, what is time, exactly?

10. As soon as you wake up.