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Dear Peacock and the NBC Universal and Comcast Executives,
My name is Josh, and I used to be one of the biggest Saved by the Bell fans in the world. I know how popular the show was, both when airing original episodes and when running them in syndication throughout the 90s and 00s,. Despite the enormity of its cult following, I still believe I must be one of the biggest fans of the show.
I’m not trying to brag. I merely want to establish that I care deeply about your looming Saved by the Bell reboot as a feature of the upcoming streaming platform, Peacock. I’m not some Internet troll fueled by snark. In case you need some actual credentials, I once wrote fanfic about Mr. Belding’s commencement address.
Anyways, the reason I am writing is because I recently read the proposed synopsis of your aforementioned reboot, and, as Mr. Belding might say to a caught-red-handed Zack Morris, “MY OFFICE. NOW!”
I cannot, and will not, sit around and watch you reboot Saved by the Bell’s reputation into the ground.
If you happen to work for NBC and somehow aren’t sure what I’m talking about, it’s this:
“When California governor Zack Morris gets into hot water for closing too many low-income high schools, he proposes they send the affected students to the highest performing schools in the state—including Bayside High. The influx of new students gives the over privileged Bayside kids a much needed and hilarious dose of reality.”
Unlike Jessie Spano, I’ve skipped right past being so excited, so excited because I am only so scared.
None of this makes sense.
Zack Morris, in this day and age, could never be governor of California.
I know politics are increasingly for morally-bankrupt, self-serving swindlers, but liberal-ass California isn’t electing a mimbo who routinely deceived women into non-consensual morass (and more ass! Sorry).
Next, the SbtB audience is not interested in topical background explanation. The show took us from middle school in Indiana to high school in California, changed out major characters for a semester at a time, and told us that Zack Morris got a 1502 SAT score. Just start episode 1 with the theme song and a beautifully diverse friend group and we’ll be hooked.
If you NEED some tie-in with the original series, your options are limited. When Boy Meets World was rebooted into Girl Meets World, the main character was Corey and Topanga’s daughter, so that cliché is taken, thus eliminating a Bayside High where a Zack and Kelly child is our protagonist. Girl Meets World also employed Corey as the history teacher, so let’s keep any of the original gang away from being a Bayside employee. So what’s left?
What if Zack became a Bayside High booster, in a Buddy Garrity from Friday Night Lights sort of way? Could the gang reunite at Bayside for a Mr. Belding funeral, and spend a few days getting nostalgic? What if a new student found the oil under the football field (again) and Mr. Belding called on the gang to come back and defend the school from the same oil barons? I even think the new show could start with Zack’s death and before he is sent to heaven or hell, he gets a chance to go back for another try at high school, in a new body.
The point is, there are lots of ways to restart the show without delving into today’s hot-button issues. And Saved by the Bell is too precious, too iconic, and too important to the pop culture consciousness of millions of loyal fans to ruin it like this.
I’m not just going to tear down your ideas and not offer any solutions. Because if you’re set on having a reboot, I believe there is a way. If you’d like more of these half-baked ideas and want to set aside some time to brainstorm, I’ll get a hall pass from work and can be ready at a moment’s notice.
Thanks for your time and thanks, preemptively, for not ruining the show,
Josh
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